Tired of the Fight? Why I Chose a Truce with Alcohol Instead of a War

For years, I thought I was just a normal guy who liked to drink. I loved the buzz, the social ease, the way it helped me unwind. I wasn’t in denial—I genuinely believed I had everything under control.

But eventually, the cost began to outweigh the perks. I started to realize that “normal” drinkers don’t lie awake at night reading the Bible for comfort… while simultaneously planning their next binge. That deep conflict was my wake-up call.

The Foundation (and Frustration) of AA

Like so many others, I turned to Alcoholics Anonymous. And in many ways, it saved my life. It gave me a foundation, a community, and a language for my struggle. I will always be grateful for that.

But I also felt a growing frustration. I watched thousands of people walk into those rooms, collect a sobriety chip, check their court-mandated boxes, and then vanish, never to be seen again. I was one of them. The program’s rigid framework of total, lifelong abstinence left me asking a dangerous, hopeful question:

What if there is another way?

What if we can make peace with alcohol instead of declaring eternal war on it?

The Turning Point: A Leap of Faith

I’ll never forget sitting in my car outside what felt like my two-thousandth meeting. I asked myself: “How much longer am I going to keep doing this? Is this really all my life will ever be?”

I felt in my soul that if I walked in there one more time, I might never walk out again. So I made a choice that felt as terrifying as walking into rehab for the first time: I decided to jump off the cliff. I decided to try drinking again.

But this time, it was different. This time, it was not about losing control. It was about finding a new kind of control. It was about learning to drink moderately, carefully, and—most importantly—with Jesus’s guidance.

To my absolute surprise, I found that for as many good lessons and events that came from sobriety, I experienced equally as many, if not more, by walking a careful, mindful path of moderation.

The Core Message: A Daily Sprint with Faith

We’re all told that faith the size of a mustard seed is enough to move mountains. But I never fully grasped the depth of that scripture until I started struggling with drinking again.

That’s when my walk with Jesus went from a quiet, comfortable stroll to an all-out, daily sprint. I learned to talk to Him constantly, to lean on Him for strength in every moment of temptation, and to listen for His guidance in every single choice I made—especially about drinking.

This journey is what led me to write Grateful Truce. It’s not a book about winning a war. It’s a book about negotiating a peace. It’s for anyone who has ever sat in their car, dreading another meeting, and wondered if there isn’t a path that leads to balance instead of burnout.

If this message resonates with you—if you’re tired of the all-or-nothing battle—you are not alone. Your journey is your own, but you don’t have to figure it out by yourself.

Explore more on this channel, and consider reading Grateful Truce to learn how you can find your own path to peace.

Chris
Author of Grateful Truce

P.S. Have you ever felt caught between two extremes? Share your experience in the comments below.