Excerpt from Introduction in the book Grateful Truce pages, 7-10

Being of Service—Finally

For most of my life, I didn’t understand what “being of service” truly meant. Today, I do. This book is my act of service—not as a doctor, preacher, or recovery guru, but as a fellow traveler who’s spent decades wrestling with alcohol, drugs, AA, rehab, and the messy truth that sobriety isn’t black and white.

My purpose for this book is twofold: first, to serve my fellow humans, and second, to serve Jesus Christ. I deliberated deeply before putting pen to paper—or fingers to keyboard—knowing that my words would be controversial and expose me to widespread criticism, dismissal, and even rage. But there’s another side to this: if even one person, a hundred or millions, find that these pages have helped, changed, or improved their lives, then I’ve fulfilled my calling—to be of service to both my Creator and my fellow humanity.

My Journey in Three Truths:

1. I Didn’t Think I Had a Problem
   1. I wasn’t in “denial”—I genuinely believed I was just another professional guy who enjoyed drinking. The buzz, the social ease, the romantic chemistry sparked. I loved it all.
   2. Until I couldn’t. Until the costs outweighed the perks. Until I realized normal drinkers don’t lie awake reading the bible while concurrently planning their next binge.

2. AA Saved Me… and Frustrated Me
   1. I’ve watched thousands walk into AA rooms, collect chips, check court-mandated boxes—and vanish. I was one of them.
   2. The program gave me a foundation, but its rigidity left me asking: What if there’s another way? What if we can make peace with alcohol instead of declaring eternal war?
   3. For those who sit in their car just like me, before their two-thousandth meeting and ask themselves: How much longer am I going to keep doing this? Is this all I’ve got for the rest of my life? If I walk in here one more time, I may never walk out again.
3. Jumping off the cliff didn’t kill me—it made me stronger.
   1. Deciding to drink again was about as hard a decision as voluntarily walking into rehab. But to my surprise, for as many good events and lessons that came from sobriety, I experienced equally as many—if not more—by drinking moderately, carefully, and with Jesus’ guidance once I started again.
   • We’re told that faith as small as a mustard seed is enough—yet I never fully grasped the depth of that Scripture until I started struggling with drinking again. Once I did, my walk with Jesus went from a quiet stroll to an all-out sprint.

The Hybrid Experiment

• Linkin Park is my favorite band. Their first album, Hybrid Theory, was—and still is—incredibly meaningful in my life. It made me reflect deeply on why they chose the title Hybrid Theory. What does ‘hybrid’ mean? To me, it’s the fusion of two or more distinct ideas into something new. If Linkin Park could seamlessly blend rap and rock into one, why can’t I find a way to balance drinking and life?
• Today, I drink, but there was a time when I didn’t. In the beginning, I drank excessively. Over time, I’ve developed what I call the math of moderation versus abstinence—a hybrid approach. Some might call this balance a normal life, but for those of us with alcoholism, it’s nothing short of a revolution.

This Book is for the “Heretics and Misfits” of Recovery

You Know Who You Are

You’re the AA Dropout:

• You collected 30-day chips like poker tokens—only to fold every time.

• Your eyes rolled at “Your best thinking got you here.”

• Newsflash: You’re not lazy. Not “unready.” The script just didn’t fit.

You’re the Data-Driven Skeptic Still Chasing Sobriety:

• You’ve seen the stats: AA’s 5-10% success rate of what? 90 days sober? One year?

• You want peer-reviewed evidence, not sunset-and-serenity brochure clichés.

You’re the “High-Functioning” Alcoholic:

No DUIs. No fired jobs. Just the exhausting math of:

• How many drinks let you “pass” as normal.
• 3 AM negotiations with your ceiling fan: “I’ll quit tomorrow.”
• “I’ll just buy a house closer to my favorite bar”.

You’re the Christian Who’s Sick of Shame:

• Churches say, “pray harder.” AA says “surrender.”

• What if Jesus meets you in the mess? What if grace covers relapses?

You’re the Family Member Watching the Spin Cycle:

• You’ve slid AA pamphlets across tables. Hidden keys. Held your breath.

• You need hope that doesn’t demand 90 meetings in 90 days.

Listen. If you’ve ever:

• Counted beers at noon, then lied about the count by happy hour.

• Dreaded the mirror more than the hangover.

• Felt alcohol erode your health, relationships, and soul—one sip at a time.

This book is for you.

I won’t define your, “too much.” I’ve seen:

• Men demolish 24 beers daily… until their body quits.

• Women unravel on three weekly glasses of wine.

Alcohol doesn’t care about your salary, skin color, or SUV’s horsepower. It’s an equal-opportunity destroyer—and society cheers it on like it’s a damn sport. But here’s the truth they rarely tell you: The system is broken. Badly. Profoundly.

Excerpt ends from Grateful Truce, pg. 7-10.

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“Your Story Matters – Let’s Build This Truce Together”

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
— Matthew 11:28 (NIV)

Where Are You Right Now?

• On the pink cloud? (90 days sober, AA every morning)
• Relapsed again? (10th reset, wondering if there’s even a “next”)
• Fresh out of jail? (Staring at a mountain of broken trust)
• Just numb? (Going through motions, waiting for a sign)

Wherever you are—you’re seen here.

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My Journey Through the Wasteland

I’ve been all of those people:

1. The AA zealot preaching “the program” while dying inside
2. The relapse statistic hiding bottles in shame
3. The courtroom regular trading dignity for plea deals
4. The moderation experimenter they warned you about

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
— Psalm 34:18

What finally worked wasn’t surrender—it was a truce:

• Not abstinence or chaos
• Not AA or isolation
• But a third path with Christ as my compass

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The Lie You’ve Been Sold

They say you only have two choices:

1. AA’s 12 steps (or bust)
2. Medicalized sobriety (pills, therapy, rehabs)

But what if—like me—both failed you?

“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?”
— Isaiah 43:19

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Join the Rebellion

Over the next year, we’ll explore:
🔥 Moderation with meaning (not just “controlled drinking”)
🔥 Jesus as sponsor (not AA’s vague “higher power”)
🔥 Recovery without shame (relapses aren’t moral failures)

Today, I need your voice:

1. Comment below with your raw truth:
   • Where are you really at today?
   • What “solution” left you more broken?
2. Share this with one person who’s still trapped

Next Week: “AA’s 5 plus years of constant sobriety nearly killed me”